i've got the cure for you


Chirp if you’re free like a bird.
August 13, 2009, 4:54 pm
Filed under: Life, Summer, the educated imagination | Tags: , ,

For once I’m ordering a drink from  Starbucks that isn’t to keep me awake for the rest of the day. Less taxing on the body. I also haven’t had the greatest sleep in awhile with all that caffeine addiction I’m starting to have. But studying with a cup of London Fog makes studying so much more satisfying. You feel like you’re absorbing your material everything 50% better.

Summer life has been feeling like a massive routine. To celebrate the end of the last course, BIO241, that I’m taking, Shuai and I decided to roam around aimlessly around downtown.  Although we’ve both in the same course for the past 3 months, we haven’t started talking until I bumped into her with another friend at a library. Quite sad actually now that I’m learning how much we have in common.

Suddenly I shouted,

“Let’s get ice cream at Yorkville!!”

“Okay…”

While roaming around and letting our stomachs do the leading, we came across Pusateri’s. In the spur of the moment, we went in. Our tastebuds finally got a good kick out of some utterly declicious cakes. It was quite pricey for two small little pieces of cakes but totally worth it. Hmm, lemon strawberry parfait cup and chocolate truffle. Fellas, if you’re looking a way into our hearts… We continued our sugar rush on top of my already immense caffeine load and went  Summer Ice Cream on Yorkville. Came out with crunchy Pistachio ice cream. I have a real liking for it now. It’s really different from the other ice cream in terms of sweetness, flavour and texture. Inulgence & calories… Oh no… Guilty feeling coming. Without realizing, our workout came to us quite quickly as we also decided at the moment to go to the AGO all the way from Yorkville. Yes, the stairs killed.

One thing that makes me somewhat admire contemporary art is how I simply sometimes cannot interpret whatever the artist was trying to convey. But you can’t help it, you’re so science oriented. I remember having a late conversation with Ted expressing my frustration sometimes with art. (Please note that this was really late and I had already been studying 8 hours straight for my exam. Random rantings helps me relieve stress. Basically, I don’t hate art is what I’m trying to say.)

“You know what I hate also… Art”

“…”

“I hate when they always give me a blank canvas and expect me to find the answer

Damn art.”

One of my many rantings during that night which turn out to be a comedy show for Ted. But as you can tell now, I’m continuing to type for the sake of something to do. Studying does crazy things to you I tell ya.

Let’s all fly away.


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BANG

After 5 days of freedom from my last exam in early may, I kicked myself straight back into school for the summer and some massive volunteering. I am thoroughly excited in taking bio during this summer as I am really developing an interest in the material that’s being taught. The more I dive into the sciences, the more I am struck with awe of the whole complexity. Volunteering has been a thrill learning all the techniques and especially the jargon. My summer has been busy and exciting in the educational aspect but I am pushing myself towards exhaustion.

Rushing from one place to another, I’ve began to plan things around myself, a lot. It’s easy to justify your faults especially arriving late with such a tight schedule that you have made the effort because you did indeed ‘rush’. But really, the highest priority on the list is none other than yourself. It’s not far from a person that is self-absorbed.  It incredibly easy to get lost in your hectic schedule that you being to forget the meaning of all and your priorities. I think I almost lost sight of it until Ted pointed it out to me. Selfishness is one of the things that I struggle to admit because I am in a strong denial that I don’t care about others more than myself. Evolutionary speaking, it is inherent for us to be selfish for our own survival, the whole idea of ‘darwinian fitness’. That doesn’t cut it. Altruism does exist among those that may or may not be related with expected benefits for both parties. But I believe in selflessness that doesn’t involve calculating the costs and benefits and this is something that I’m trying to learn as a growing Christian. The more I analyze the little details of my life, I can see the little subtle things that I do and unknowingly do as a habit that really is selfish. As stubborn as I am sometimes to change when I am given the opportunities to learn selflessness, I am repenting and working on it.

I’m beginning to realize how important it is to take a day of Sabbath to really help recharge and put your life back into the right perspective. It’s a time to really let yourself tune out all of that noise in your life and really listen for His voice. As students, we’re so caught up and worried about our GPA  and planning our future career that our achievements become our worth. We become defined by our marks, wealth, our prestigious professions and successes. What is left of you when all of that is stripped away? Naked in shame? I am learning to not let myself be defined by my successes because I am not only setting my expectations on a higher pedestal but I’m creating this ‘SuperYi-Min’ that I begin to live by. Failing to achieve it will make you depressed, frustrated, and perhaps more driven to get it. What’s even worse is when your parents create this superwhatever for you and set this as your own goal. dYou will become exhausted, burned out, fall hard on your failures all to attain such an unhealthy and superficial goal. It’s beyond discouraging. Your superwhatever will kill you. The meaning of my life is not defined by my SuperYi-Min. Should yours?

“And the only way to not be killed by it is to shoot it first. Yes, that is what I meant to write. You have to kill your superwhatever. And you have to do it right now. Because your superwhatever will rob you of today and tomorrow and the next day until you take it out back and end its life. Go do it.” – Rob Bell from Velvet Elvis

Goodbye SuperYi-Min.



Lyca
February 28, 2008, 9:00 am
Filed under: Life | Tags:

I didn’t realize just how much practicality there was in writing my extended essay on William Blake’s Songs of Innocence and Experience. It wasn’t until I encountered my own problems and using a more objective observation were all the parallels revealed to me. As a kid, we grow up in a sheltered world that our parents provide and try to live the life that they guide us through. Lyca, from The Little Girl Lost, wants to all asleep around a lion which, according to the parents, is malicious and will eat her alive. But Lyca shows how sometimes we should just rely on our instincts and trust what we believe and rather what our parents say. Her parents asks how she can even sleep if she is in danger. Continue reading